Dr. Fenwick, a neuropsychiatrist, assembled anecdotes from more than 300 people in his book “The Truth in the Light.” Here are some of them.
I didn’t fully understand the limits of my body until this past June, when I fell down my fire escape and floated outside myself in a near-death experience, much like the ones Peter Fenwick — a psychiatrist who researched end-of-life phenomena — documented over the course of his career. (Dr. Fenwick died on Nov. 22 at 89.)
I was at my own housewarming party, standing on the fire escape with two friends, when I fell, tumbling around 12 feet and hitting my head. I lost consciousness for several minutes.
As my friends tell it, the paramedics arrived quickly, detached the screen from a window on the second floor and hauled me downstairs in a stretcher. As they loaded me into the ambulance, I rose above myself and watched the fanfare: the concerned neighbors stepping into the street; the pale pink of sunset; my own body, small and far away in the stretcher as my roommate held my palm and my friend held my ankle. Their touch snapped me back into consciousness. I immediately felt pain and begged for water.
It wasn’t the first time I’d had what felt like an out-of-body experience. When I was a teenager, I became fascinated by astral projection — intentional out-of-body travel — and began to put it into practice at night. One evening, I hurtled toward the ceiling and watched myself sleep. A line tugged out from my sternum to my belly button. It resembled an umbilical cord: silver and long as a rope.
I had a similar sensation after my fall, albeit without the cord. The doctors diagnosed a severe concussion, and I spent the next three weeks recovering in my new home. At first, I struggled to derive meaning from my sudden proximity to death. Then I thought about fragility — and the thousands of minute ways humans evade death every day without knowing it — and my experience concretized into a newfound appreciation of our bodies’ capacity for self-preservation and a diminished fear of death.
I was reminded of my near-death experience when I learned that The New York Times, where I work, would be publishing Dr. Fenwick’s obituary.