{"id":35138,"date":"2025-09-23T01:17:13","date_gmt":"2025-09-23T01:17:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/medexperts.pro\/?p=35138"},"modified":"2025-09-23T01:23:46","modified_gmt":"2025-09-23T01:23:46","slug":"i-didnt-want-sex-with-my-husband-after-having-our-baby","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/?p=35138","title":{"rendered":"I didn&#8217;t want sex with my husband after having our baby"},"content":{"rendered":"<div data-component=\"byline-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<div data-testid=\"byline-new\" class=\"sc-c4820dd1-0 cYDsPh\">\n<div class=\"sc-c4820dd1-1 jZKXfd\">6 minutes ago<\/p>\n<p><button disabled type=\"button\" aria-label=\"Share\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-2 sc-28fdc07f-5 sc-28fdc07f-6 dlYDVt diMtqv hnXVJa\"><span data-testid=\"button-icon-wrapper\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-0 Fzgas\"><\/span><span data-testid=\"button-text\" aria-hidden=\"false\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-1 jjqoAk\">Share<\/span><\/button><button disabled type=\"button\" aria-label=\"Save\" data-action=\"save\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-2 sc-28fdc07f-5 sc-28fdc07f-6 hyMuGj gQfYWA jZyXEp\"><span data-testid=\"button-icon-wrapper\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-0 Fzgas\"><\/span><span data-testid=\"button-text\" aria-hidden=\"false\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-1 jjqoAk\">Save<\/span><\/button><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><span data-testid=\"byline-new-contributors\" class=\"sc-c4820dd1-11 bxdaHR\"><\/p>\n<p><span class=\"sc-c4820dd1-7 dbQBRo\">Emily Holt<\/span><span data-testid=\"undefined-role-location\" class=\"sc-c4820dd1-8 evcqcz\">BBC News<\/span><\/p>\n<p><\/span><\/p>\n<p><button disabled type=\"button\" aria-label=\"Share\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-2 sc-28fdc07f-5 sc-28fdc07f-6 dlYDVt diMtqv hnXVJa\"><span data-testid=\"button-icon-wrapper\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-0 Fzgas\"><\/span><span data-testid=\"button-text\" aria-hidden=\"false\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-1 jjqoAk\">Share<\/span><\/button><button disabled type=\"button\" aria-label=\"Save\" data-action=\"save\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-2 sc-28fdc07f-5 sc-28fdc07f-6 hyMuGj gQfYWA jZyXEp\"><span data-testid=\"button-icon-wrapper\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-0 Fzgas\"><\/span><span data-testid=\"button-text\" aria-hidden=\"false\" class=\"sc-28fdc07f-1 jjqoAk\">Save<\/span><\/button><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<figure>\n<div data-component=\"image-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 kSquvq\">\n<div data-testid=\"hero-image\" class=\"sc-86c96223-1 evkFpM\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/medexperts.pro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/c0d60430-9557-11f0-b830-3f3c6ed9c9f6.jpg.webp\" loading=\"eager\" alt=\"Holly Hagan-Blyth Black and white photo of Holly and her baby cuddling while lying in bed\" class=\"sc-86c96223-0 fHZDyi\" \/><span class=\"sc-86c96223-2 hqrvRC\">Holly Hagan-Blyth<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/figure>\n<div data-component=\"text-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Sex is an integral part of many people&#8217;s relationships. But for some, a loss of libido is common after life-changing events, such as pregnancy and childbirth, according to the <a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nhsinform.scot\/illnesses-and-conditions\/sexual-and-reproductive\/loss-of-libido\/#:~:text=Loss%20of%20libido%20(sex%20drive,as%20pregnancy%2C%20childbirth%20or%20breastfeeding.\" class=\"sc-f9178328-0 jZoZnB\">NHS<\/a>. <\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Reality TV star and fitness coach Holly Hagan-Blyth says this happened to her after having her son.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;I could have said, &#8216;listen, if you don&#8217;t touch me ever again, I&#8217;m not even bothered&#8217; because that&#8217;s just how I felt at the time,&#8221;  she said when co-hosting the <a target=\"_self\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bbc.co.uk\/programmes\/p0ly6bkg\" class=\"sc-f9178328-0 jZoZnB\">CBeebies Parenting Helpline<\/a>. <\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Sex and relationship therapist Rachel Gold said mothers often expect to become intimate again after their six-week postnatal check.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;I think that really fools people into believing that this must be the time to have sex again, but it isn&#8217;t true.&#8221; <\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div data-component=\"text-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Holly said her sex drive dipped after the arrival of her son Alpha-Jax in 2023 and she started to avoid any sort of intimacy.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;Whenever I would give him [her husband Jacob] any type of affection, like a touch or a cuddle, I felt it was going to lead to the full thing, to sex, and I didn&#8217;t want that.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;I started having a negative connotation doing anything towards him.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Being open with her husband helped, she says.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;As soon as I said, this is how I&#8217;m feeling, &#8216;whenever I&#8217;m cuddling you and touching, can we just not make it lead to the next thing? Because it&#8217;s just making me not want to do that&#8217;, and all of a sudden everything was so much better because that pressure was taken off.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div data-component=\"text-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Her husband Jacob was worried she no longer fancied him.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;I was like, &#8216;you need to realise this has nothing to do with you. I am feeling this way at the moment, but I don&#8217;t think any differently of you.'&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;I don&#8217;t really feel like having sex right now, or even maybe in the next few months. This is my issue that I&#8217;m going through, and I just need to work through it.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Holly hopes that couples experiencing the same issues can be more open.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;People do say the relationship changes after having a child, but I don&#8217;t think that until you&#8217;re in it, you really, truly, realise how much it changes.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div data-component=\"text-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Dr Jennifer Lincoln, a specialist in obstetrics and gynaecology, says there are many reasons why women may not want to have sex after giving birth. <\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;There&#8217;s a lot of healing that happens. It takes about six weeks for the uterus to return to its pre-pregnancy size. Any tears in the vagina or perineum are also healing.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">There are also big hormonal changes for women which can impact their libido. <\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;Levels of estrogen and progesterone drop drastically. The lower estrogen levels can lead to physical changes like vaginal dryness, which can make sex painful.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;People usually think menopause is the single most acute shift in hormone levels that a woman will ever experience, but actually the few days surrounding childbirth are.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<figure>\n<div data-component=\"image-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jHorPx\">\n<div data-testid=\"image\" class=\"sc-86c96223-1 evkFpM\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/medexperts.pro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/grey-placeholder.png\" class=\"sc-86c96223-0 iMuqLZ hide-when-no-script\" aria-label=\"image unavailable\" \/><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/medexperts.pro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/09\/e58c6de0-9585-11f0-b465-4509a888107c.jpg.webp\" loading=\"lazy\" alt=\"Holly Hagan-Blyth Holly, her husband and baby at the gym\" class=\"sc-86c96223-0 fHZDyi\" \/><span class=\"sc-86c96223-2 hqrvRC\">Holly Hagan-Blyth<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/figure>\n<div data-component=\"text-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">It&#8217;s not just an issue that affects mothers. CBeebies Parenting Helpline listener Frankie, who had her baby three months ago, said her male partner had gone off sex.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;I hate my body at the moment, and all I want is a bit more attention from my partner, but he just doesn&#8217;t want to have sex with me anymore. I feel stuck.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Rachel says that men sometimes struggle to be open about their feelings.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;Stepping into fatherhood can bring up all sorts of things in a man&#8230; that could be a very big factor putting him off wanting to have sex.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">Fleur Parker, a practitioner from childbirth charity the NCT, says dealing with these emotions is often not seen as a priority for men.<\/p>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\">&#8220;Talking honestly to your partner about how you&#8217;re feeling can really help; do not assume they know what&#8217;s happening or what you are thinking.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<h2 class=\"sc-f98b1ad2-0 fsBZby\">Tips for couples starting sex again after birth<\/h2>\n<div data-component=\"text-block\" class=\"sc-3b6b161a-0 jdlrvG\">\n<ul class=\"sc-6f869981-0 bYhyhr\">\n<li class=\"sc-734a601e-0 NnDUj\">If penetration hurts, say so. If you pretend that everything&#8217;s all right when it isn&#8217;t, you may start to see sex as unpleasant <\/li>\n<li class=\"sc-734a601e-0 NnDUj\">Take it gently, hormonal changes after childbirth may mean couples may need to use a lubricant to help make sex more comfortable<\/li>\n<li class=\"sc-734a601e-0 NnDUj\">Make time to relax together. You&#8217;re more likely to engage in intimacy when your minds are on each other rather than on other things<\/li>\n<li class=\"sc-734a601e-0 NnDUj\">Get help if you need it. If a mother is still experiencing pain when they have their postnatal check, it is important to talk to a local GP<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p class=\"sc-9a00e533-0 bJoRPJ\"><i id=\"advice-provided-by-the\" class=\"sc-d16436d-0 gbdkAi\">Advice provided by the <\/i><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nhs.uk\/baby\/support-and-services\/sex-and-contraception-after-birth\/#:~:text=There%20are%20no%20rules%20about,from%20pharmacies%2C%20to%20begin%20with\" class=\"sc-f9178328-0 jZoZnB\"><i id=\"nhs\" class=\"sc-d16436d-0 gbdkAi\">NHS <\/i><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>6 minutes agoShareSaveEmily HoltBBC NewsShareSaveHolly Hagan-BlythSex is an integral part of many people&#8217;s relationships. But for some, a loss of libido is common after life-changing events, such as pregnancy and childbirth, according to the NHS. Reality TV star and fitness coach Holly Hagan-Blyth says this happened to her after having her son.&#8221;I could have said, &#8216;listen, if you don&#8217;t touch me ever again, I&#8217;m not even bothered&#8217; because that&#8217;s just how I felt at the time,&#8221; she said when co-hosting the CBeebies Parenting Helpline. Sex and relationship therapist Rachel Gold said mothers often expect to become intimate again after their six-week postnatal check.&#8221;I think that really fools people into believing that this must be the time to have sex again, but it isn&#8217;t true.&#8221; Holly said her sex drive dipped after the arrival of her son Alpha-Jax in 2023 and she started to avoid any sort of intimacy.&#8221;Whenever I would give him [her husband Jacob] any type of affection, like a touch or a cuddle, I felt it was going to lead to the full thing, to sex, and I didn&#8217;t want that.&#8221;&#8221;I started having a negative connotation doing anything towards him.&#8221;Being open with her husband helped, she says.&#8221;As soon as I said, this is how I&#8217;m feeling, &#8216;whenever I&#8217;m cuddling you and touching, can we just not make it lead to the next thing? Because it&#8217;s just making me not want to do that&#8217;, and all of a sudden everything was so much better because that pressure was taken off.&#8221;Her husband Jacob was worried she no longer fancied him.&#8221;I was like, &#8216;you need to realise this has nothing to do with you. I am feeling this way at the moment, but I don&#8217;t think any differently of you.'&#8221;&#8221;I don&#8217;t really feel like having sex right now, or even maybe in the next few months. This is my issue that I&#8217;m going through, and I just need to work through it.&#8221;Holly hopes that couples experiencing the same issues can be more open.&#8221;People do say the relationship changes after having a child, but I don&#8217;t think that until you&#8217;re in it, you really, truly, realise how much it changes.&#8221;Dr Jennifer Lincoln, a specialist in obstetrics and gynaecology, says there are many reasons why women may not want to have sex after giving birth. &#8220;There&#8217;s a lot of healing that happens. It takes about six weeks for the uterus to return to its pre-pregnancy size. Any tears in the vagina or perineum are also healing.&#8221;There are also big hormonal changes for women which can impact their libido. &#8220;Levels of estrogen and progesterone drop drastically. The lower estrogen levels can lead to physical changes like vaginal dryness, which can make sex painful.&#8221; &#8220;People usually think menopause is the single most acute shift in hormone levels that a woman will ever experience, but actually the few days surrounding childbirth are.&#8221;Holly Hagan-BlythIt&#8217;s not just an issue that affects mothers. CBeebies Parenting Helpline listener Frankie, who had her baby three months ago, said her male partner had gone off sex.&#8221;I hate my body at the moment, and all I want is a bit more attention from my partner, but he just doesn&#8217;t want to have sex with me anymore. I feel stuck.&#8221;Rachel says that men sometimes struggle to be open about their feelings.&#8221;Stepping into fatherhood can bring up all sorts of things in a man&#8230; that could be a very big factor putting him off wanting to have sex.&#8221;Fleur Parker, a practitioner from childbirth charity the NCT, says dealing with these emotions is often not seen as a priority for men.&#8221;Talking honestly to your partner about how you&#8217;re feeling can really help; do not assume they know what&#8217;s happening or what you are thinking.&#8221;Tips for couples starting sex again after birthIf penetration hurts, say so. If you pretend that everything&#8217;s all right when it isn&#8217;t, you may start to see sex as unpleasant Take it gently, hormonal changes after childbirth may mean couples may need to use a lubricant to help make sex more comfortableMake time to relax together. You&#8217;re more likely to engage in intimacy when your minds are on each other rather than on other thingsGet help if you need it. If a mother is still experiencing pain when they have their postnatal check, it is important to talk to a local GPAdvice provided by the NHS<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":34940,"comment_status":"close","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[33],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-35138","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35138","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=35138"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35138\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":35143,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35138\/revisions\/35143"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/34940"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=35138"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=35138"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=35138"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}