{"id":14341,"date":"2024-10-08T17:00:25","date_gmt":"2024-10-08T17:00:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/medexperts.pro\/?p=14341"},"modified":"2024-10-08T17:29:28","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T17:29:28","slug":"how-to-set-boundaries-without-the-guilt","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/?p=14341","title":{"rendered":"How to Set Boundaries Without the Guilt"},"content":{"rendered":"<div><\/div>\n<p id=\"article-summary\" class=\"css-79rysd e1wiw3jv0\">Setting boundaries often means disappointing others. We asked therapists for advice on how to do it \u2014 without feeling guilty.<\/p>\n<section class=\"meteredContent css-1r7ky0e\">\n<div class=\"css-s99gbd StoryBodyCompanionColumn\" data-testid=\"companionColumn-0\">\n<div class=\"css-53u6y8\">\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">In the last few years, several celebrities have captured the spotlight by stepping back to prioritize their mental health.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">First it was <a class=\"css-yywogo\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2021\/07\/28\/sports\/olympics\/simone-biles-mental-health.html\" title>Simone Biles<\/a> bowing out of the 2020 Olympics early. Then <a class=\"css-yywogo\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2021\/06\/02\/well\/mind\/job-work-mental-health.html\" title>Naomi Osaka<\/a> avoided talking to the press at the 2021 French Open, and the singer <a class=\"css-yywogo\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2024\/08\/09\/arts\/music\/playlist-shawn-mendes-kelsea-ballerini.html\" title>Shawn Mendes<\/a> canceled a tour in 2022. Most recently, the pop star Chappell Roan <a class=\"css-yywogo\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2024\/09\/27\/arts\/music\/chappell-roan-cancels-festival.html\" title>pulled out of two music festival performances<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">These high-profile acts of self-preservation highlight an uncomfortable truth: Although self-care <a class=\"css-yywogo\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2023\/03\/15\/well\/mind\/self-care-womens-health.html\" title>is important<\/a>, putting your own needs first often means letting others down. When you set boundaries, there is a good chance that \u201csome people will experience hurt, anger and disappointment,\u201d said Juliane Taylor Shore, a licensed therapist and the author of \u201cSetting Boundaries That Stick.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">The prospect of disappointing someone may cause you to set aside your own needs, Ms. Shore said, but you can get better at saying \u201cno\u201d without beating yourself up. We asked her and other mental health experts to share a few strategies.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div data-testid=\"Dropzone-1\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"css-s99gbd StoryBodyCompanionColumn\" data-testid=\"companionColumn-1\">\n<div class=\"css-53u6y8\">\n<h2 class=\"css-1u37br4 eoo0vm40\" id=\"link-3843fa6d\">Understand why saying \u2018no\u2019 feels uncomfortable.<\/h2>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">Amy Wilson, 54, is a self-described former people pleaser. But early in the pandemic, she found herself overextended while caring for a child with a chronic health issue. For the first time, she had to learn to get comfortable saying \u201cno.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">When she announced the tough decision to step down as the board president of an organization where she volunteered, she said a \u201cweird silence\u201d followed.<\/p>\n<div class=\"css-1336jj\">\n<div class=\"css-121kum4\">\n<div class=\"css-171d1bw\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"css-asuuk5\">\n<div class=\"css-7axq9l\" data-testid=\"optimistic-truncator-noscript\">\n<div data-testid=\"optimistic-truncator-noscript-message\" class=\"css-6yo1no\">\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">We are having trouble retrieving the article content.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"css-1dv1kvn\" id=\"optimistic-truncator-a11y\">\n<hr \/>\n<p>Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/myaccount.nytimes.com\/auth\/login?response_type=cookie&amp;client_id=vi&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F10%2F08%2Fwell%2Fmind%2Fboundaries-self-care-advice.html&amp;asset=opttrunc\">log into<\/a>\u00a0your Times account, or\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/subscription?campaignId=89WYR&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F10%2F08%2Fwell%2Fmind%2Fboundaries-self-care-advice.html\">subscribe<\/a>\u00a0for all of The Times.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"css-1g71tqy\">\n<div data-testid=\"optimistic-truncator-message\" class=\"css-6yo1no\">\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Thank you for your patience while we verify access.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Already a subscriber?\u00a0<a data-testid=\"log-in-link\" class=\"css-z5ryv4\" href=\"https:\/\/myaccount.nytimes.com\/auth\/login?response_type=cookie&amp;client_id=vi&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F10%2F08%2Fwell%2Fmind%2Fboundaries-self-care-advice.html&amp;asset=opttrunc\">Log in<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Want all of The Times?\u00a0<a data-testid=\"subscribe-link\" class=\"css-z5ryv4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/subscription?campaignId=89WYR&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F10%2F08%2Fwell%2Fmind%2Fboundaries-self-care-advice.html\">Subscribe<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Setting boundaries often means disappointing others. We asked therapists for advice on how to do it \u2014 without feeling guilty.In the last few years, several celebrities have captured the spotlight by stepping back to prioritize their mental health.First it was Simone Biles bowing out of the 2020 Olympics early. Then Naomi Osaka avoided talking to the press at the 2021 French Open, and the singer Shawn Mendes canceled a tour in 2022. Most recently, the pop star Chappell Roan pulled out of two music festival performances.These high-profile acts of self-preservation highlight an uncomfortable truth: Although self-care is important, putting your own needs first often means letting others down. When you set boundaries, there is a good chance that \u201csome people will experience hurt, anger and disappointment,\u201d said Juliane Taylor Shore, a licensed therapist and the author of \u201cSetting Boundaries That Stick.\u201dThe prospect of disappointing someone may cause you to set aside your own needs, Ms. Shore said, but you can get better at saying \u201cno\u201d without beating yourself up. We asked her and other mental health experts to share a few strategies.Understand why saying \u2018no\u2019 feels uncomfortable.Amy Wilson, 54, is a self-described former people pleaser. But early in the pandemic, she found herself overextended while caring for a child with a chronic health issue. For the first time, she had to learn to get comfortable saying \u201cno.\u201dWhen she announced the tough decision to step down as the board president of an organization where she volunteered, she said a \u201cweird silence\u201d followed.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and\u00a0log into\u00a0your Times account, or\u00a0subscribe\u00a0for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber?\u00a0Log in.Want all of The Times?\u00a0Subscribe.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":14343,"comment_status":"close","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14341","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14341","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14341"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14341\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14344,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14341\/revisions\/14344"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/14343"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14341"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14341"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14341"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}