{"id":11598,"date":"2024-08-21T09:00:17","date_gmt":"2024-08-21T09:00:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/medexperts.pro\/?p=11598"},"modified":"2024-08-21T09:23:50","modified_gmt":"2024-08-21T09:23:50","slug":"sex-therapists-hear-about-these-issues-a-lot","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/?p=11598","title":{"rendered":"Sex Therapists Hear About These Issues a Lot"},"content":{"rendered":"<div><\/div>\n<p id=\"article-summary\" class=\"css-79rysd e1wiw3jv0\">We asked nearly a dozen experts in sex and intimacy for the advice they repeat again and again. For starters, they said, don\u2019t get so hung up on how often you have, or want, sex.<\/p>\n<section class=\"meteredContent css-1r7ky0e\">\n<div class=\"css-s99gbd StoryBodyCompanionColumn\">\n<div class=\"css-53u6y8\">\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">Couples worried about \u201cmismatched\u201d libidos. People struggling to orgasm. Lovers wondering if they\u2019re having a \u201cnormal\u201d amount of sex.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">Sex therapists, educators and researchers tend to see these issues over and over again.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">So Well reached out to several of them to ask: What do you wish more people knew about sex and intimacy?<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">Here\u2019s what the experts had to say.<\/p>\n<h2 class=\"css-1u37br4 eoo0vm40\" id=\"link-af4bc95\">1. Comparison is the thief of sexual joy.<\/h2>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">Lori Brotto, a psychologist and professor at the University of British Columbia who is the author of \u201cBetter Sex Through Mindfulness,\u201d spends a lot of time trying to persuade people to discard the concept of a \u201cnormal\u201d sex life when it comes to how and how often they get intimate.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">The frequency with which couples have sex is not a meaningful measure of sexual health, she said, even though it is something \u201cpeople get really hung up on.\u201d It doesn\u2019t tell you anything about whether individuals are actually enjoying time with their partners, and the sex they\u2019re having, she added.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div class=\"css-s99gbd StoryBodyCompanionColumn\">\n<div class=\"css-53u6y8\">\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">\u201cI have worked with couples who are having sex every night and are miserable together,\u201d echoed Casey Tanner, a sex therapist based in New York City and author of \u201cFeel It All.\u201d Conversely, she has worked with couples who feel deeply connected and who have sex maybe three times a year.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-at9mc1 evys1bk0\">Let go of the numbers game, Ms. Tanner urged, and instead focus on how each sexual experience feels.<\/p>\n<div class=\"css-1336jj\">\n<div class=\"css-121kum4\">\n<div class=\"css-171d1bw\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"css-asuuk5\">\n<div class=\"css-7axq9l\" data-testid=\"optimistic-truncator-noscript\">\n<div data-testid=\"optimistic-truncator-noscript-message\" class=\"css-6yo1no\">\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">We are having trouble retrieving the article content.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"css-1dv1kvn\" id=\"optimistic-truncator-a11y\">\n<hr \/>\n<p>Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/myaccount.nytimes.com\/auth\/login?response_type=cookie&amp;client_id=vi&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F08%2F21%2Fwell%2Fsex-therapy-questions.html&amp;asset=opttrunc\">log into<\/a>\u00a0your Times account, or\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/subscription?campaignId=89WYR&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F08%2F21%2Fwell%2Fsex-therapy-questions.html\">subscribe<\/a>\u00a0for all of The Times.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"css-1g71tqy\">\n<div data-testid=\"optimistic-truncator-message\" class=\"css-6yo1no\">\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Thank you for your patience while we verify access.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Already a subscriber?\u00a0<a data-testid=\"log-in-link\" class=\"css-z5ryv4\" href=\"https:\/\/myaccount.nytimes.com\/auth\/login?response_type=cookie&amp;client_id=vi&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F08%2F21%2Fwell%2Fsex-therapy-questions.html&amp;asset=opttrunc\">Log in<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p class=\"css-3kpklk\">Want all of The Times?\u00a0<a data-testid=\"subscribe-link\" class=\"css-z5ryv4\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/subscription?campaignId=89WYR&amp;redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F08%2F21%2Fwell%2Fsex-therapy-questions.html\">Subscribe<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We asked nearly a dozen experts in sex and intimacy for the advice they repeat again and again. For starters, they said, don\u2019t get so hung up on how often you have, or want, sex.Couples worried about \u201cmismatched\u201d libidos. People struggling to orgasm. Lovers wondering if they\u2019re having a \u201cnormal\u201d amount of sex.Sex therapists, educators and researchers tend to see these issues over and over again.So Well reached out to several of them to ask: What do you wish more people knew about sex and intimacy?Here\u2019s what the experts had to say.1. Comparison is the thief of sexual joy.Lori Brotto, a psychologist and professor at the University of British Columbia who is the author of \u201cBetter Sex Through Mindfulness,\u201d spends a lot of time trying to persuade people to discard the concept of a \u201cnormal\u201d sex life when it comes to how and how often they get intimate.The frequency with which couples have sex is not a meaningful measure of sexual health, she said, even though it is something \u201cpeople get really hung up on.\u201d It doesn\u2019t tell you anything about whether individuals are actually enjoying time with their partners, and the sex they\u2019re having, she added.\u201cI have worked with couples who are having sex every night and are miserable together,\u201d echoed Casey Tanner, a sex therapist based in New York City and author of \u201cFeel It All.\u201d Conversely, she has worked with couples who feel deeply connected and who have sex maybe three times a year.Let go of the numbers game, Ms. Tanner urged, and instead focus on how each sexual experience feels.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and\u00a0log into\u00a0your Times account, or\u00a0subscribe\u00a0for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber?\u00a0Log in.Want all of The Times?\u00a0Subscribe.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":11600,"comment_status":"close","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11598","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11598","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11598"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11598\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11601,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11598\/revisions\/11601"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/11600"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11598"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11598"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/medexperts.pro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11598"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}