At these retreats in places like Costa Rica, California and the Berkshires, you’ll learn how to express your desires, enhance intimacy and build self-confidence.
Fifteen years ago, seeking reconnection and to fuel our flames in the bedroom, my husband and I ditched our three kids for a weekend-long couples’ retreat called “Better Communication, Better Sex,” at the Miraval Arizona Resort & Spa in Tucson, Ariz. There were separate workshops for women and men, a detailed anatomy review, exercises to encourage affection and expression, and nightly “homework,” with accessories provided (think a feather and some massage oil). End result: The fire’s still burning.
Turns out we were on the front end of a recent trend of sexual wellness retreats, where relationship experts, bodywork therapists and medical spas offer programs centered on intimacy and desire, as well as treatments to improve sexual well-being. Research suggests the need is real — even in long-term relationships, people are aware of just 60 percent of their partner’s sexual preferences, and only 25 percent of their dislikes.
There’s a range of retreats emerging, and the experience can vary, with a focus on experiential exercise, group discussion or bodywork — or a mix of all three. But they all aim for participants to find comfort in their body; enhance intimacy and communication around safety, desires and boundaries; heal past wounds; and build confidence to cultivate deeper sexual connections.
“Retreats take on a whole new meaning because you take people outside of their domesticity and into nature, which awakens the senses,” said Esther Perel, a psychotherapist and the author of “Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence.” “People bring the same issues to therapy as they bring to a retreat, but they experience it completely differently. They come to a therapist’s office to talk about their problems; they go to a retreat to improve something or experience something new.”
Here are five all-inclusive destinations and retreats that offer sexual wellness programs and treatments. Most of these workshops are open to individuals, couples and L.G.B.T.Q. participants, but a few are gender-specific. It’s best to confirm before you book.
Nosara, Costa Rica